Maxim, September 2005
1. Find Your Faith
Macking in a holy place is easier than almost anywhere elseÄîthe good girls never see it coming. Plus, Äúevery girl wants to tell her father she met her boyfriend at church and not at a bar,Äù says God-fearing cutie Erin Howard, 25. Look for progressive sanctuaries that offer ÄúcontemporaryÄù services (to attract a younger, hipper crowd) and coffee hours (so you can actually talk, as opposed to just ogling from afar).
2. Enter the Kingdom
Scope out the finest churchgoer, then snag the pew in front of her. You wonÄôt appear too eager, yet you can make eye contact easilyÄîand shake her hand if thereÄôs a Äúsharing of the peace.Äù Avoid making moves mid-service. ÄúYouÄôre in a place of bloody worship; you have to be respectful,Äù notes Tracey Cox, author of Superdate. Instead, listen to the sermon, whichÄôll give you plenty to talk about later.
3. Get Religion
Despite the communion wine, forget your sloppy bar tactics. After the service, just introduce yourself and act genuinely curious about the church. Say, ÄúIÄôm new here. Are you a regular?Äù ThisÄôll transition to the coffee hour, where you can quiz her about the service and how she ended up there. If all else fails, say something about looking for a higher meaning in life. She may make it her goal to ÄúconvertÄù you.
4. Reach the Promised Land
At this point patience is key. ÄúA lot of repressed religious girls are damn hot in bed,Äù notes Cox. ÄúBut youÄôre not getting a quick shag here.Äù Provided sheÄôs sending positive signals (e.g., laughing, smiling, not making the sign of the cross), simply tell her youÄôd love to meet up, outside of church, and ask for her digits. And no matter where it goes from there, try to think like the Browns do: ThereÄôs always next Sunday!
Thank God we have some godly men who can spot these guys from a mile away.