Gospel Reformed vs Being too Reformed

The gospel and triperspectivalism are essential for reformed people. Why?  Because all too often we see a strong relationship between being 'reformed' and being contentious (see 1Tim3:3).  The other day someone posted an 'ultra-reformed' reply on an old post.  I went to his blog and found a numerous posts bashing Rick Warren, Benny Hinn, Market-Driven churches and the Emerging movement.  I can't say I disagreed with some of the assessments, but to have the majority of your posts be negative/attacks seems pretty high.  It reminded me of my past, where I was more concerned with winning the argument than loving a person.  

Be only as reformed as the gospel allows. 

The gospel changes us to hopefully be more grace-filled in how we approach others.  As we grow in the gospel, we should become both more humble personally yet confident in Jesus.  We can rejoice in the identity we have already been given of perfect sonship.  The gospel removes the 'poke-them-in-the-eye' debate mentality to win at all costs.  The gospel means we are more concerned with mission than shooting Christians in the back on the way to war.

Secondly, perspectivalism helps us become a more well-rounded person through community.  I believe that those who come to the reformed position tend to be prophets.  Prophets can become doctrine-focused/Normative.  As John Frame writes in his Primer on Perspectivalism:

…perspectivalism is an encouragement to the unity of the church. Sometimes our divisions of theology and practice are differences of perspective, of balance, rather than differences over the essentials of faith. So perspectivalism will help us better to appreciate one another, and to appreciate the diversity of God’s work among us