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Tim Keller vs. John Piper Deathmatch

It's gotten to this. djchuang posts on Why I like Keller more than Piper.  A new wave of preacher Deathmatches are sweeping the internet, where will it go?

  • Mark Driscoll vs. Joshua Harris
  • John MacArthur vs. Andy Stanley
  • Rick McKinely vs. Chris Seay
  • Bill Hybels vs. Rick Warren
  • Ed Young vs. Joel Osteen
  • Mark Moore vs. David Fairchild

Oh the insanity… (HT: Reformissionary)

6 Comments

  1. Here’s my predictions:

    Driscoll over Harris- This is an easy one. Driscoll grew up behind a strip club and fought his whole life, still fighting today.

    MaCarthur over Stanley- This would simply be because John MaCarthur has a higher view of God’s sovereignty, so when the chips are down on his side, he’ll have the courage of a man who trusts that no matter what happens, it will honor God. That’s like Popeye’s spinach man!

    McKinley over Seay- Are you kidding me? McKinley would would squash Seay like a bug. Seay’s gangling, so he might get some shots off on the outside, but once Rick gets ahold of him, it’s all over baby.

    Warren over Hybels- C’mon, didn’t he write “Purpose Driven Cage Match?”

    Osteen over Young- This is a shocker, I know, but Osteen has a midwest work ethic, while Young is just a bit too Metrosexual for me. He’s worry about his pedicure too much and Osteen has the pearly white chompers to bite with.

    Fairchild over Moore- Now, this is another tough one. If Moore had his Marine issues M16, I’d be in a world of hurt, but if it was hand to hand, I think I’d have the edge. He’s bald, so that’s always scary, plus he’s from Texas, so you know those guys don’t like to loose at anything. But, I grew up in the woods with Mr. Miagi as my sensei.

  2. Let me admit that this is the first time that I have ever posted a comment on a blog. I’m not too big into the world of reading blogs and have personally never felt it necessary to post a reply. Not so today.

    My picks:

    Driscoll over Harris

    MacArthur over Stanley

    McKinley over Seay

    Warren over Hybles

    Osteen vs. Young- neither one. They would both piss themselves and run into the loving arms of their body gaurds.

    Moore over Fairchild- are you kidding me. Every good warrior knows his opponent well. I would recognize that having had Mr. Miagi as his sensie he would be tough. The problem is that an M16A2 service rifle has a maximum effective range of 550 meters on a point target. Since I was once a marksmanship instructor in the USMC I would be extremely accurate from that range. Bad news for Fairchild, last I checked his reach measured in at less than a meter.

  3. Mark Driscoll vs. Joshua Harris – Josh is half Japanese and in better shape, he must be quicker also. The fact that he kissed dating goodbye at one point tells me he is tough. Harris.

    John MacArthur vs. Andy Stanley – My first thought was MacArthur but then I thought that with his Lordship theology he might just abstain from the fight. I will take Stanley and the points.

    Rick McKinely vs. Chris Seay – I will take McKinely because he knows how to find Jesus in different places and Seay would probably be distracted looking for a new technique or theory.

    Bill Hybels vs. Rick Warren – This would be a good old fashion gang fight, what parking lot could hold the people that would show up for each side? The only thing I know for sure is that it would be broadcast in the sanctuary of both churches which obviously would bring people into the church. Draw!

    Ed Young vs. Joel Osteen – Osteen would will himself to victory with positive self talk.

    Mark Moore vs. David Fairchild – Ok, I confess I don’t know Mark but I am guessing Fairchild would slay him with words and only resort to fighting if necessary.

  4. John Piper wins it at googlefight.com lol

  5. “I follow Paul”; another, “I follow Apollos”; another, “I follow Cephas”; and the super-spiritual, “I follow Christ.”

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